When my body dies…

(To dispel any instant assumptions, I will preface this with: I am not sick. I am not depressed or suicidal. So now…)

Death is as age-old as birth. And in my belief, you can’t have one without the other. It’s natural. It’s created as part of the cycle for all organic things. Our bodies die because they are designed to. Our bodies need to die, as much as they need to live. That is their job. Their work. Their creation.

make a wish and send it to heaven

When my cycle brings me to that point of my job, my work, my creation… when my cycle brings me to the death of my body… my friends, I want you to know:

I’m sorry. I’ve tried to apologize throughout the years for hurt I’ve caused, but sometimes there are things I didn’t realize I did or said that hurt you, and I’m sorry I wasn’t aware enough to recognize that. Sometimes I perhaps actually didn’t do something that you may truly, truly believe I did, and with those times, I’m so sorry you felt hurt, unheard, unseen, unsafe, or uncared for. Sometimes, too, there is hurt I’ve caused of which I AM aware, and I haven’t found the readiness to “go there” yet. Sometimes my own heart is hurting over the situation and I need to allow it the time it needs to mend before I can apologize for my part in it. But I am sorry, for all of that hurt. I hope you feel our love.

I forgive you. (I already did, long ago.) There is not one thing, not one single thing, for you to feel guilt, shame, or sorrow over. You didn’t and don’t need to do anything for my forgiveness. You have it. I hold no anger, no resentment, no bitterness towards you. Please forgive yourself. I hope you feel our love.

I won’t leave you. (You know I’m a bit of a magical little imp in this area!) Close your eyes and you will see me, hear me, and/or feel me. I will send you signs when you ask me to. I will be a wonderful listener. I will be at your celebrations (send me an invitation!) and anytime you want to share something with me, please do! When you want me to be around, I want SO MUCH to be! And be on the lookout, because you know I’ve always enjoyed a good April Fools prank. 😉 I won’t leave you. I’m yours. I hope you feel our love.

You are going to be okay. Let your feelings be what they are. Let your thoughts run away. Let whatever happens happen. Then go to bed. Sleep. Get up and have a glass of water. Put some healthy fuel in your body and step out into the sunshine. Even if it’s -16 degrees outside. Feel the sunshine, feel the zip of the air, feel the earth turn. And go get moving on your day. Sweet love, I know not every day is a good day. Some days are horrible. But you ARE going to be okay. Every time you’re NOT becomes a tool in your toolkit. You take that shitty moment, shitty day, shitty event, and you stick it in your toolkit, because at some point down the road, it is going to help you with something else. It is going to be just what you needed to tackle some other thing. Guaranteed. You can see this in every bad thing that’s happened to you in the past. You might have to really TRY to find how it was helpful, but if you keep trying, you will find it’s gift. Every single thing. And this bad day, bad week, bad whatever – it is now a tool, and you are an insanely talented creator. You are the badassiest contractor in town. Use your tools and I promise – you are going to be okay. I hope you feel our love.

I love you. You are so, so precious to me. A joy for me! One of my greatest blessings. My heart pours out to you. I am so grateful for you. I’m so grateful for sharing this space and time with you. You fill me. You fill me. I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you.

I hope you feel our love. ∞

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3 Ways to Clear Emotions Which Are Not Yours

Smooth sailing as I drove down the highway headed home. The sky was babiest of blues, with tufts of white feathery clouds. The day was slow, easy, lovely. Except… I was full of rage.

It didn’t make sense! There was no reason for anger! I’d spent my work day with honey-sweet people in a sleepy little town in southern Iowa. Nothing was amiss; there were no extremes in life. And yet, I felt so furious that I found myself wanting to roar! Consciously, rationally, I knew that not only was there no reason for it, but it didn’t even feel like it was coming from me. There was only one possibility I could think of: I was carrying somebody else’s pain.

Getting help

I called a friend of mine who, at the time, was my go-to whenever I was experiencing emotions that didn’t feel like mine.  “Can you clear me? I don’t know what’s going on. I’m so angry, but there’s no reason for it.”

She talked to me for a few minutes, calmly, chatting with me about other things so as to distract me from the feeling. Meanwhile, psychically (“remotely” as we call it in Reiki) she cleared the anger from me. Within minutes I felt totally relieved of it. It was like someone had taken an invisible squeegee to my chest, scraping off a bucket of black tar and leaving me sparkly and clean. I knew then and there that I needed to learn how to do that for myself.

Here’s the deal: feelings and emotions are energy.

They exist, and because they have no physical form to which they have to adhere, they can float, move, and be directed anywhere, anytime. Emotions don’t have to be mindful of the rules we humans have created about space and time; they can appear in any place, at any time, and even weave and split through dimensions. They can, consciously or unconsciously, be transferred from one person to another. Heads up to those who relate to the terms “empath” or “highly sensitive person” – this can create a challenge for folks like us, because we are created and tuned in a way that we experience all types of energy – those of our own and those of others (including plants, animals, spaces, elements, etc. – which is a whole other post).

Over the years, I’ve learned a few really cool techniques for clearing energy. Depending on the circumstance, I might choose one technique over another. I always tune in to my intuition to help me determine what will be most helpful at any given time. I recommend for you to do the same.

Here are a few of my favorite techniques for clearing other peoples’ energy off and out of my own energy field.

1. Clearing statements
2. Reiki
3. Visualization with intention

1. Clearing statements. A clearing statement is, in a nutshell, spoken intention. In using one, a person creates a phrase that removes a thought, belief, or feeling from her/himself, and can do so out loud or silently. The way I usually word a clearing statement to remove someone else’s energy or emotion from me might sound like this:

“Every part of this anger that is not mine, I totally and completely release it now. I clear all of it from my energy field and from my body, and release it down into Mother Earth to be neutralized and transmuted into something beautiful. I also seal and solidify my protective surrounding and block any additional energy from entering.”

2. Reiki. When I’m experiencing energy or emotions that aren’t mine, I like to call on my Reiki training. Again, depending on what I’m feeling, and always using my intuition, I might place my hands in the positions over the heart chakra, throat chakra, or around my head, and begin Reiki with the intention of clearing and releasing what is not mine, healing what is mine, and protecting myself from more incoming.

3. Visualization with intention.  Because I’m highly visual in my mind’s eye, this is one of my staples. It also works fantastically well when I do it for other people remotely (from a distance). If you are strong with clairvoyance (seeing images in your mind) or find it easy to participate in guided meditations or visualizations, this one may be very easy for you to use.

To do it: create quiet space for yourself and close your eyes.  In your imagination or mind’s eye, bring yourself to see the space around your heart, head, throat, wherever you’re experiencing the emotion or sensation that is not yours. You might see the energy that is not yours in some form – perhaps as particles, strings or strands, a block or wall around your head/heart, etc. or you might not see it.

Imagine that all of the energy that is not yours is being cleared from you – you might see yourself sweeping or combing through your energy field or you might visualize a shower of silver or golden light or water cleansing down you from above. Whatever image comes to mind for you is perfect. Visualize the space around you, on you, and within you being cleared and cleansed of all that is not yours and all that is not needed, and imagine it washing down a drain at your feet, into the earth.

Once when doing this remotely for someone who had been in a bad mood all day, I had to energetically chip away at what seemed like hard clay all around her head. Later, without telling her exactly what I’d seen or done in my mind’s eye, she told me that her head felt much lighter and clearer, and the bad mood was gone. Another friend, who was experiencing overwhelming sadness that was not hers, reported instantly feeling it lift when I clairvoyantly swept through the energy around her head, raking my fingers through, collecting all that was not hers and removing it.

Intention

The most important ingredient in all of these techniques is intention. Intention is making a conscious decision. It is believing that what you are doing is actually working and making a difference. It is acknowledging something as True. Things done with intention are more potent, so if you remember nothing else when the time comes to clear, remember that using intention is the key to releasing anything that is not yours and does not serve you.

Try these out and let me know how they work for you!

♥ Amber

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To Be Quiet…

dictionary.com definition of quiet

dictionary.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

To be quiet…

To be quiet is to not have to respond. To not have to answer. To not have to solve. To detach from the instructions and obligations and constraints and restraints. To not have to be anything or anyone other than…

To be quiet is to allow. (Do you feel that in your belly? The allowing?)

To be quiet is to clear away all of the things that the fearful part of you clings to so that it won’t be alone. The TV. The radio. The phone. The computer. To be quiet is to clear them all away.

To be quiet is to care so much for yourself that you give yourself your full attention. Like you would do your best friend. Like your best friend would do for you.

To be quiet is to hear.

To be quiet is to feel your presence. Your body. Your Soul. To be quiet is to exist. To be quiet is to be Sacred.

To be quiet is to rest. To be quiet is to heal. And so…

To be quiet is to grow.

To be quiet is to grow

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Starting from Square 1 – When All of Life Sucks

I recently came across a post in a group where a woman shared that she is in a low point of life right now. Nothing is where she wants it to be. I could totally relate, and if you find yourself in a place like that right now too, I want to share with you my response to her…

… I relate to your story. That was me a few years ago, when my son was a baby. The marriage, the house, my relationship with my son, my work, not having a social/support circle, depression… nothing felt good and I prayed almost every day for my angels to just take me away from the planet.

poopy

Life was poopy.

It’s been 3 or 3 1/2 years now and my life is completely different.

My marriage is stable, loving, and supportive. My house is company-ready almost all the time (still needs de-cluttering and more work, but we’ve come a HUGE way). My son and I are so sweetly bonded and I’m so much more patient and happy and loving with him – we go on adventures together on Wednesdays when he’s not in preschool, and we share snuggles all day long. I left my last job and started self-employment from home, which I do when my son is at school or at his grandparents’ house – it is hugely rewarding, even if the income isn’t what puts food on the table.

I have a beautiful social circle now, with a few friends I know I can go to whenever I need to, and we message almost every day, even if it’s just to say one random thing that happened. I learned a lot of healing modalities in these last few years and did mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical work with myself – the depression is gone, and I know it won’t be back again. I wanted to share these things with you because I wanted to point out that in just a few years, one’s life can be completely different. There is hope.

Here are a few things I did, incase they’re helpful for you.

I wrote my bucket list and a “100 Things I Want to Do This Year” list. And I started doing them, whether I had someone to join me or not. I included even little things like local restaurants I wanted to try or movies I wanted to see. I included things I’d like to take my son to, and we do them on our Wednesdays together. (Check out my bucket list program here: http://www.celebrateyourpath.com/gifts/ignite/)

I took classes through our public school’s community education class. On my own. Through them, I’ve done everything from Guitar for Beginners (which I still can’t get the hang of and that’s okay!), to Indian Cooking, to Restorative Yoga, to Juggling, and Bellydancing! It has been so enjoyable and has brought me back to my Self, my identity, and my independence!

I challenged myself to saying, “Yes,” to everything anyone invited me to, whether it was for lunch or to a Pampered Chef party, whether I wanted to or not. I challenged myself to it for 30 days, and then continued on because it only started gaining momentum at that point. (Check out my “Yes Ma’am Challenge” here: http://www.celebrateyourpath.com/gifts/yes-maam-challenge/)

I found a therapist I loved. I looked forward to appointments because it was an appropriate outlet for my emotions, and she helped me with awarenesses I wouldn’t have gotten to on my own.

I had readings with my psychic. Because I’m into that. (And now I do psychic readings for others too.) So that’s my jam.

I learned Reiki and other energetic healing and clearing modalities and worked through some of my big stuff. Big friendships came within my Reiki class. Big healing. Big learning. Big growth.

I wrote letters to my son and tucked them away into a box for him when he’s older. Just whenever the moment struck me, and just wrote about some of the things he’s doing or saying lately. Or something fun that happened, like Christmas or his birthday or a trip.

I started *really* listening to my husband. Not half-assed with the laptop on my lap at the same time. But really listening, and getting curious about him and his day, and asking him more questions to develop our conversations further.

I started telling my husband more about my inner thoughts and feelings. And I would let him know that it was hard for me to talk about things because they were my inner things, and I really needed him to be supportive and open-minded. He never failed me when I was vulnerably honest with him.

I used the concepts taught by FlyLady (flylady.net) for creating my own morning routine, afternoon routine, and evening routine. It only took me a month of sticking to those routines to have our house company-ready all the time. That made SUCH a huge difference in my head and heart!

I read. I prefer non-fiction self-development type books, and spirituality/healing/New Age type stuff, so I feel like I’m constantly growing. I follow my curiosity and interest at any given time, so there’s always something interesting to learn.

Those are what I can think of off the top of my head. You can do it. One foot in front of the other, stay committed to your soul, and before long, you’ll be looking back at amazement with how far you’ve come too. I love you!

P.S. If you’d like help moving towards your desires, let’s work together in one of my coaching programs!

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You’re not addicted to soda. You’re thirsty!

When I started coaching myself and guiding myself through the same process I would take a client, I had a number of realizations, revelations, and awarenesses. One of them was big. Like – saw-the-last-21-years-in-a-completely-new-light Big.

Soda.

Soda! The one addiction I’ve never been able to fully shake. Starting back when I was 15 years old and thought a Mountain Dew every day was the best thing on Earth. (Nowadays, Cherry Coke is my jam.) I’ve tried 30-day no-soda challenges, giving it up completely, cutting back, switching to caffeine-free soda, you name it. But… the cravings pull me back in.

So. I went on my coaching journey.

An important side note: my soda crush wasn’t even on my “out-of-balance” list; it wasn’t even on my radar. Which is a funny little thing about going through coaching – things often come to the surface quite naturally, even if you hadn’t consciously thought of them to begin with, as you start to move yourself towards more mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual wellness. In other words, when you decide to heal something, even more healing jumps on board the party bus.

During the first couple of steps in my self-coaching journey, I knew I needed a lot of focus on my physical self. I was experiencing excruciating back pain at the time, and obesity. Those were my top 2 areas I wanted to bring towards more balance.

As I designed my Wellness Plan and kept my daily wellness log, one of the things I wanted to work on was drinking 8 glasses of water a day. I know the benefits of drinking water – you hear about them and see articles about them all the time. (But knowing something is good for you doesn’t always make you do it, right?) I knew that drinking more water would help ground me, help me concentrate, aid my digestion and appetite, give me more energy, and help my organs function better. What I didn’t know was that it would completely zap my soda cravings.

Here’s the unexpected way that I found out.

One morning around 10:30 or 11 AM, I noticed that I was starting to crave a soda. I had only consumed 2 glasses of water by then, and since it was still morning (and I have a judgment about drinking soda in the morning), I told myself that I would not drink any before noon. Also, I have a standing deal with myself that I want to have 4 glasses of water in my system every day by noon. It helps me stay on top of my hydration goal. So I downed 2 glasses of water and went back to doing work.

Just after 12:00 noon, without really thinking, I had another glass of water, and then I remembered that I’d been craving a soda just a little while before that. To my surprise, not only was I not craving soda anymore, but I just plain didn’t want it! If someone would have offered me one right then, I would have turned it down – I was totally uninterested! This may not sound like a big deal, but to me it was! My craving had not just dissipated – it was in reverse. My body felt totally satisfied and had not even the tiniest of urges to drink any soda.

Water had totally satiated my body. I realized then that all this time, I’d been starving myself of water. My body had been calling out for it for decades – I wasn’t giving it enough! I tested out my theory over the next few weeks, and every single time, when I gave my body more water, my desire for soda totally, completely disappeared. The back-and-forth battle in my head about knowing it’s not good for me but desperately wanting it anyway totally, completely disappeared. The conclusion I came to was that I wasn’t addicted to soda. I was just thirsty!

Now, every single time I feel that soda craving kick up, my first thought is, “Oh! My body’s asking for water!” I take down as much as I feel I need right then and there, and then return to my life. I have not given up soda completely. I sometimes enjoy having it! I don’t feel that I need to give it up altogether. But what I thought was an addiction that I just couldn’t beat has turned out to simply be a realization that my body needs water.

There is no addiction here – just a need that is met easily, instantly, and healthfully.

If you relate to the soda cravings or self-proclaimed “soda addiction”, I invite you to try on this theory. Try on the practice of drinking 4 glasses of water by noon, and not having a soda until that water is in your system. Each time you feel a soda craving, drink 1-2 glasses of water first, and see if that helps. Just try it on and see if it fits. What have you got to lose?

you're not addicted to soda. you're thirsty.

You're not addicted to soda. You're thirsty.

P.S. Your own revelations and truths are waiting for you! Let’s work together to uncover them. Share This: Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedintumblrmailFacebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedintumblrmail