Starting from Square 1 – When All of Life Sucks

I recently came across a post in a group where a woman shared that she is in a low point of life right now. Nothing is where she wants it to be. I could totally relate, and if you find yourself in a place like that right now too, I want to share with you my response to her…

… I relate to your story. That was me a few years ago, when my son was a baby. The marriage, the house, my relationship with my son, my work, not having a social/support circle, depression… nothing felt good and I prayed almost every day for my angels to just take me away from the planet.


Life was poopy.

It’s been 3 or 3 1/2 years now and my life is completely different.

My marriage is stable, loving, and supportive. My house is company-ready almost all the time (still needs de-cluttering and more work, but we’ve come a HUGE way). My son and I are so sweetly bonded and I’m so much more patient and happy and loving with him – we go on adventures together on Wednesdays when he’s not in preschool, and we share snuggles all day long. I left my last job and started self-employment from home, which I do when my son is at school or at his grandparents’ house – it is hugely rewarding, even if the income isn’t what puts food on the table.

I have a beautiful social circle now, with a few friends I know I can go to whenever I need to, and we message almost every day, even if it’s just to say one random thing that happened. I learned a lot of healing modalities in these last few years and did mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical work with myself – the depression is gone, and I know it won’t be back again. I wanted to share these things with you because I wanted to point out that in just a few years, one’s life can be completely different. There is hope.

Here are a few things I did, incase they’re helpful for you.

I wrote my bucket list and a “100 Things I Want to Do This Year” list. And I started doing them, whether I had someone to join me or not. I included even little things like local restaurants I wanted to try or movies I wanted to see. I included things I’d like to take my son to, and we do them on our Wednesdays together. (Check out my bucket list program here:

I took classes through our public school’s community education class. On my own. Through them, I’ve done everything from Guitar for Beginners (which I still can’t get the hang of and that’s okay!), to Indian Cooking, to Restorative Yoga, to Juggling, and Bellydancing! It has been so enjoyable and has brought me back to my Self, my identity, and my independence!

I challenged myself to saying, “Yes,” to everything anyone invited me to, whether it was for lunch or to a Pampered Chef party, whether I wanted to or not. I challenged myself to it for 30 days, and then continued on because it only started gaining momentum at that point. (Check out my “Yes Ma’am Challenge” here:

I found a therapist I loved. I looked forward to appointments because it was an appropriate outlet for my emotions, and she helped me with awarenesses I wouldn’t have gotten to on my own.

I had readings with my psychic. Because I’m into that. (And now I do psychic readings for others too.) So that’s my jam.

I learned Reiki and other energetic healing and clearing modalities and worked through some of my big stuff. Big friendships came within my Reiki class. Big healing. Big learning. Big growth.

I wrote letters to my son and tucked them away into a box for him when he’s older. Just whenever the moment struck me, and just wrote about some of the things he’s doing or saying lately. Or something fun that happened, like Christmas or his birthday or a trip.

I started *really* listening to my husband. Not half-assed with the laptop on my lap at the same time. But really listening, and getting curious about him and his day, and asking him more questions to develop our conversations further.

I started telling my husband more about my inner thoughts and feelings. And I would let him know that it was hard for me to talk about things because they were my inner things, and I really needed him to be supportive and open-minded. He never failed me when I was vulnerably honest with him.

I used the concepts taught by FlyLady ( for creating my own morning routine, afternoon routine, and evening routine. It only took me a month of sticking to those routines to have our house company-ready all the time. That made SUCH a huge difference in my head and heart!

I read. I prefer non-fiction self-development type books, and spirituality/healing/New Age type stuff, so I feel like I’m constantly growing. I follow my curiosity and interest at any given time, so there’s always something interesting to learn.

Those are what I can think of off the top of my head. You can do it. One foot in front of the other, stay committed to your soul, and before long, you’ll be looking back at amazement with how far you’ve come too. I love you!

P.S. If you’d like help moving towards your desires, let’s work together in one of my coaching programs!

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Self-discovery runs through my veins

Hello, my name is Amber, and I’m obsessed with self-discovery.

Amber Diehm Heuer

My mom has said, on several occasions, that I think too much.

My husband, at times when I have shared with him a weird and wonderful synchronicity, sign, symbol, whatever you want to call it, and how I feel that it relates to my life, has said, “I’m listening to you. It sounds cool. I just don’t understand it.”

(This is one of the beautiful things about family, by the way. They may not get us, but they still show up every day as our mom, our partner, etc. And they try again. Or they don’t. Either way is fine, because the point is they keep showing up as our family.)

Anyway, my loved ones can attest: I have always been searching. And thinking. Wandering and wondering.

I can’t even pinpoint a time when it started, but two of my [many] catalysts were when I started writing my bucket list (at age 25) and when I read the book “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne. (There is also a (semi-cheesy) movie version of “The Secret”.)

My degree is in Social Work, and a great deal of the education and work within that field are based in psychology, sociology, culture. Self-discovery!

Since I (with intention) began my spiritual journey in 2013, I’ve encountered countless theories about what God is, about the Soul, about Purpose, about healing, about why things happen. Self-discovery!

And when I dove into the curriculum to become a certified integrative coach, I unlocked a chest full of new tools and awarenesses. Self-discovery!

To me, it’s fascinating. Each time you uncover something and fit that piece together with another, it’s like finding clues to a mystery. That’s not just thrilling – it’s hugely rewarding. Because it means that life makes more sense. When life makes more sense, it becomes a lot easier. Lighter. A lot more cozy. You can breathe again. You can smile. You can even laugh.

It hasn’t always been so for me. How about you?

That’s why I’m so passionate about self-discovery. Because, quite simply, it makes life better.

Join me, starting February 7th, 2017, for Total Transformation, an 8-week whole-life integrative coaching program that provides the tools, support, and resources for you to set and achieve goals, move towards wellness and balance, and overcome negative patterns. The program is holistic – that is, it helps you move towards your desired outcomes in all four aspects of your Self: mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual. Register here:

Total Transformation

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